Tomorrow might be different, the sky's the limit.

The place where I post new ideas regarding my ever-changing theology and philosophy. The place where I post thoughts and rants. A way for you to keep up to speed on what's going on in my life. Finally, I've given up and jumped on this blog bandwagon...and I don't think you need an account to comment, so please do so!! Enjoy...

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Just a guy trying to figure out what it means to follow Jesus...

Monday, April 18, 2005

Read This: It Is Hilarious

This is one of the funniest things I have ever read.  Enjoy.

 

The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington Chemistry mid-term.

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most ot the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.  One student, however, wrote the following:

First we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time.  So we need to know that rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving.  I think that we can safely say that once a soul gets to Hell it will not leave.  Therefore, no souls are leaving.

As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today.  Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell.  Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.  With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially.  Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you," and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over.

Of course, the corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct...leaving only Heaven thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God!"

This student received the only "A"

2 Comments:

Anonymous Kris said...

That's so great!!

12:14 AM  
Anonymous Stacey said...

Hysterical :)
I can't help but wonder what Teresa felt like when and if she read this. If she killed the smart guy, as she very well may have, then I suppose he got his answer...:)
--Stace

10:02 PM  

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